Christian Centre, Pastor David Adeoye, and his wife Sunmbo Adeoye, who
is an entrepreneur, music minister and public speaker, talk about their
ministries and the intricacies of their marriage.
look at the glamour around the life of a pastor especially when God is
beginning to bless the pastor and people start to give him cars and
houses. Right now, I could get a call saying a member has just been
delivered of a set of twins. A few minutes later, i may get another call
saying a member just passed away. It is a job that tosses your emotions
up and down. Later, I may get another call saying a member just passed
away. It is a job that tosses your emotions up and down. You cannot even
have a life of your own because you have to make yourself available for
members of the church. People think pastors are supermen, that must not
make mistakes. They forget that we are also human beings. To manage
people, success, growth, failure and other things is tough.
back, I don’t know how I survived most of the things I have been
through. I lost my dad when I was 25 and my mum died when I was 32. I
lost my first wife about six years ago, so I have seen betrayal and
dishonesty. One of the things that have really helped is that I trust
absolutely in God. I always go back to God though His word and I always
come out in a victorious manner. When I was to get married to my wife,
the crisis that ensued was out of this world. It was the worst kind of
noise I have ever heard in my life. I faced problems from my family and
also the church. Only my friends did not give me problems. Everywhere I
turned to, I was faced with criticism.
marriage that lasted for 13 years without a child, so my family, mentors
and friends were eager to see me remarry. Initially, I never wanted to
remarry and planned to adopt two children that would be cared for by a
nanny. As time went on, I realised that plan was not going to work
because about that time, the number of female worshippers in church was
on the increase. Then, I knew that if I really wanted to play safe, I
needed to remarry.
called mama, there was noise but it was sympathisers’ noise; but when I
started dating Sunmbo, the noise changed to something else. It was
horrible. Because I had a strong conviction in me that she was my wife, I
did not care. People would call me almost every time to ask if I had
seen what had been written about her in one magazine or newspaper.
People feared that dating her and eventually getting married to her
would destroy the church because worshippers had started to leave the
church.
stumbled on a video of Joyce Meyer and that was how I got to know
that she was a single mother who was in an abusive marriage before she
met and married David Meyer, who had never been married before he met
her. As soon as I watched that video, an inner voice told me that the
way Joyce Meyer commended her husband is the same way the world would
commend me by the time I am done with Sunmbo. We have been married for
three years and I don’t regret getting married to her. Most of the
people who kicked against me marrying her have come back to apologise.
known Sunmbo as far back as 1998. She is a music minister and I had a
brother who had a gospel rap group. She was the only girl among them.
When she finished singing one fateful day, even my late wife commended
her singing prowess. I never thought that we would one day get married.
In fact, she was close to my late wife such that when she fell from
faith during her dark days, my late wife played a major role in her
restoration.
experiences became my greatest attraction. You can hardly find a man of
God who married a single mother; most men of God married a virgin. Every
time, the body of Christ in Nigeria preaches 2 Corithians 5:17 but do
not believe it. I saw people run away from me because they felt I had
embarked on a risky journey when I started dating Sunmbo.
in a simple manner and unlike my wife, I do not like too many colours
but I try to wear incorporate colours into what I wear. One of the
things marriage does to you is change you and I have had to embrace
colours in my dressing.
years, it became monotous and I wanted a better work-life balance. It
got to a point in my banking journey that I became really tired and
started thinking of something that I could do.
that I naturally churn out by way of service but because I was working
in a bank, I did not pay so much attention to it. In 2008, I started
writing a business plan and I registered the company. I had children
already and I wanted more out of my time. I was carrying a burden in my
heart because I was making money but I was not spending time with my
children and I did not even have enough time to serve God. I started
to seek God’s face and He told me to resign and go to serve Pastor
Adeoye.
in January of that year, I just resigned and the following day which was
a Tuesday, I attended Success Summit in Church. I went to meet pastor
and told him I had resigned from my job because God told me to go and
understudy him. What we had at that time was a father and daughter
relationship and his late wife was still alive at that time. I brought
my business plan to him and mama to review. Unknown to me, God had gone
ahead of me to also tell him to mentor me. They introduced me to a lot
of people who helped to fine tune my business plan and I also attended
the Lagos Business School under the Goldman Sach’s scholarship.
seven. My parents are committed members of a Baptist Church. My parents
were choristers in church so I think that is where I got my gift of
singing from. As a teenager, I became a member of the choir. As a youth,
I became the coordinator of the youth choir.I lived my life as an altar
minister and I was committed to kingdom service the whole of my life.
Even when I gained admission into Yaba College of Technology, I still
found my way to joining Original Love Choir , which is the choir
Midnight Crew came out from.
access the Goldman Sach’s scholarship helped my business to grow. I
thought that if God availed me this privilege, why don’t I extend a hand
of fellowship to other women and support entrepreneurial ideas. I made
up my mind to help improve people through mentorship and advisory
services. I also started a movement whose focus is to ensure that the
future of the girl child is safe and secure. We have supported, learned
and unlearned people by empowering them with work tools and cash gifts.
can never be prepared for becoming a mother until you are delivered of
the child and you begin to care for the child. When I was a mum and a
banker was a different phase from when I became a mum and an
entrepreneur. That was also a different phase from when I became a wife,
mother , entrepreneur and running the NGO on the side. If it is God
that has called me to do all of these, He has equipped me before now.
But I keep learning and improving. I have mentors who are doing all that
I do better and I look up to them. My husband is my number one mentor
and Pastor Nomthi Odukoya is another person I look up to. The Internet
is big and you can learn from people who you are not even friends with
but are connected to through the social media.
been my pastor. He is someone I always went to for mentorship, so when
he came across as wanting to be my husband, I was a bit scared. Even
though I knew I was asking God for a husband, a father, friend and
mentor, I did not know it was my pastor that was going to fit in because
nobody was praying for his wife to die. When he made his intentions
known, I thought maybe if I stayed away from church, he would forget
about me. I realised that whenever I stayed away from church, I would
lose my peace. I was a committed member of the church as well as the
praise team lead.
began to ask God if it was what He wanted for me. I knew my past and I
told God I was going to drop my tall, dark and handsome standard for
whatever He wanted for me.
relationship. The first thing I noticed was that people close to him
were coming closer to me and they would always invite me to be in their
midst. I think it was a strategy for them to know me because people
were saying a lot of things about me. To so many people who did not know
me, I was a club girl and baby mama. I challenged God to rewrite my
story and He did because I was just a victim of circumstance. This is me
who used to sing in Ebenezer Obey’s church. I was a spiritual daughter
of one of his sons, Pastor Lanre Obey. I used to lead praise sessions at
Obasanjo’s chapel at Ota, Ogun State. Even when I worked with
Intercontinental Bank Plc, I used to lead praise sessions. I knew I had
the call of God on my life but unfortunately, I fell in love with
someone and instead of me bringing the person into the light, I was
dragged into something I never bargained for and I started having babies
out of wedlock. I was only a victim of my emotions.
relationship. I met Tuface when I was a student of Yaba College of
Technology. I had just lost my dad and my mum was living in America.
For someone who was a daddy’s girl, I needed love. This was the only
person that was showing me love at that time. I feel I had that
experience so that other young girls would not make the same mistake. I
was 24 when I fell pregnant the first time.
approached the pastor of the church I was attending then and he brought
me out before the church and judged me. I was asked to go and bring the
father of my unborn child so we could be joined together. I brought a
different person and we got married at the registry. Everything fell
apart when I had a child who looked nothing like him and my mum came
back from America to ask who gave my hand out in marriage because she
was not a part of it. I had to walk out of the marriage which I arranged
by myself. I moved back home and by age 25 I was already a single mum
and a divorcee. There was so much shame and reproach.
that the Devil you know is better than the angel you don’t know, so I
went back to my baby daddy and his mum talked me into living with him so
he won’t have more women and babies. We lived together for three years
and that was how the second pregnancy happened.
there because I was trying to put together what was not supposed to be. I
think we broke up in 2009 after I had the second baby. There were other
women who were also going to have babies for him around that time. I
came to my senses like the prodigal son and I was so broken. I think my
baby daddy was out of the country that fateful day when I returned from
work and I packed all my things plus that of my children, and I went
back to my parents’ home.
of glory and responsibilities. It also comes with a lot of glamour and
commitment. It comes with its own challenges and God has equipped us to
handle everything. This is not the Sunmbo that got married to Pastor
Adeoye three years ago. I am a better person and I am now refined.
also play with my children because I am grooming them so that they can
be very free around me. I also like to watch movies at the cinema ,
listen to music and write.
