“I am one of those people who say they got pregnant by accident. I got
pregnant at 19 just in my second year of university. I didn’t expect to
get pregnant because I took the necessary precautions. From the beginning I wasn’t sure in my mind whether I should keep the
baby. The father had already denied me.
I didn’t have a father figure
in my life so I didn’t know what to do. I thought of how I was going to tell my mom, I didn’t know how she
would react, especially being that I am the first and only child. I
didn’t even know where to start. I felt I had already let her down.
WORST FEAR
My worst fear became a reality; my mom became harsh with me. It was
like a switch in her flipped. She even refused to be associated with me.
like a switch in her flipped. She even refused to be associated with me.
She didn’t want a kid who was in my kind of situation; forced to drop
out of school in second year. She abused me, verbally and physically.
out of school in second year. She abused me, verbally and physically.
I had never seen this side of my mother. We only had each other and I
thought that would never change. Yet there she was, the one person I
thought would always be there for me, turning her back on me.
thought that would never change. Yet there she was, the one person I
thought would always be there for me, turning her back on me.
RAN AWAY
Everything was too much. I ran away. I had to escape because even my
own mother wanted me to get rid of the baby. I had already made up my
mind that I was going to have it. With some money saved up, I decided to start a small business. I
prepared chips and crisps and sold them. I rented a shack and used it as
my house, paying Kshs. 1,500 rent every month. I had to survive. I
couldn’t let my baby down.
own mother wanted me to get rid of the baby. I had already made up my
mind that I was going to have it. With some money saved up, I decided to start a small business. I
prepared chips and crisps and sold them. I rented a shack and used it as
my house, paying Kshs. 1,500 rent every month. I had to survive. I
couldn’t let my baby down.
Through a friend I found out my aunt had relocated to Nairobi. I was
unsure on how she would react to me being pregnant. She was very close
to my mom. I took the risk and went to see her; I had nothing to lose
and everything to gain.
unsure on how she would react to me being pregnant. She was very close
to my mom. I took the risk and went to see her; I had nothing to lose
and everything to gain.
My aunt decided to secretly help me because she knew I didn’t want my
mother getting involved. She used to visit me in my shack, every day
until I gave birth.
mother getting involved. She used to visit me in my shack, every day
until I gave birth.
SAVING GRACE
Giving me advice and checking on how baby and I were doing. She was
the saving grace that I badly needed. I had no one. She gave me the love
and care that my own mother denied me. When I finally gave birth, I couldn’t imagine that I wanted to get
rid of someone so innocent. I imagined how I would have felt if I got an
abortion. It made me hate myself for a while. I had to find a way to
love myself again. It helped that no one in the area knew my story. They
just saw me as a stranger with a baby.
the saving grace that I badly needed. I had no one. She gave me the love
and care that my own mother denied me. When I finally gave birth, I couldn’t imagine that I wanted to get
rid of someone so innocent. I imagined how I would have felt if I got an
abortion. It made me hate myself for a while. I had to find a way to
love myself again. It helped that no one in the area knew my story. They
just saw me as a stranger with a baby.
Then
I met a man. He always wondered how such a young girl was so
stressed. I told him my story, he told me his. I kept on asking myself
why anyone would be interested in someone like me. As time went by, we
became friends. I didn’t have friends. I had been rejected by everyone
and was raising a baby on my own.
I met a man. He always wondered how such a young girl was so
stressed. I told him my story, he told me his. I kept on asking myself
why anyone would be interested in someone like me. As time went by, we
became friends. I didn’t have friends. I had been rejected by everyone
and was raising a baby on my own.
NAIJA MAN
He was nice to me and wanted to take care of me. He sort of felt
sorry for me. He gave us-my baby and I- an apartment to live in. He also
sent me money. Enough money to ensure the baby got everything she
needed. I was even able to finish my education.
sorry for me. He gave us-my baby and I- an apartment to live in. He also
sent me money. Enough money to ensure the baby got everything she
needed. I was even able to finish my education.
He took me to Nigeria and gave me money to start my own salon business. When he asked me to marry him, how could I refuse?
He took me and my baby in as his own. He took us from nothing and
gave us everything. I knew for once, God remembered that I exist.”
gave us everything. I knew for once, God remembered that I exist.”
